Archive for toads

Parable of the Princess and the Toad

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , on July 27, 2010 by Charl

There was once a lonely princess. She knew she was a princess because – well, she just knew she was. She was lonely, sooo lonely. There was a time when she was certain a brave knight would come in shining armour on a white steed, to whisk her away to his kingdom. Over the years, she had seen quite a few knights, but they never seemed to quite fit in with that picture she had in her mind of how it ought to be. Soon, the shining armour was dropped as requirement, armour would do. After some more time passed, the steed was sacrificed for just a horse, any horse. Well, who needs a horse anyway if someone would just save her from her lonely existence.

Then one day, she heard of this princess who had found her prince who was in the guise of a frog – just needed a kiss to unmask the prince in the frog! Made perfect sense, so she started hanging out down by the pond and riverbanks, trying to unmask her prince when she was sure no-one was looking. First time was really hard as the hapless frog gazed back at her quizzically. Still, she was not to be put off, and frogs weren’t too warty at all, if you closed your eyes when you puckered your lips you could almost picture the prince. Well, after some time the frogs all knew to hop into the water when she came unless you wanted to be planted one on the face.

Eventually a toad happened along as the marsh he lived in had been laid dry by a drainage scheme for property development. The princesses’ matted hair nearly kept her from seeing him, but he was given away by the slurp of his tongue fetching in a large bluebottle fly. Her posture nearly matched his as she had learned to stoop low to find that elusive prince and her eyes had a permanent bulge from peering over the grass and reeds to see if anyone was coming. She had developed a few warts too from the close contact with amphibians, but she figured the prince wouldn’t mind, given his personal acquaintance with wartiness. She pounced on the Toad and before he knew what was happening, he was tall and handsome and kissing a toady looking girl that might have had a chance, had he still been one.

After they got over their initial shock, he went on to marry a princess he met at a charity dinner for a species of endangered frogs that the erstwhile frog princess had established after becoming an respected authority on frogs. They all lived happily ever after in the marshiest part of the kingdom.